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WHERE ARE THE DIFFERENT BEATS?

Lygon Street, Brunswick Street, Chapel Street, Acland Street, sometimes the Eastern Suburbs, all get done. We've started doing Ballarat and Bendigo as well. Some bands let you do their gigs, so I got to do the REM concert one night.

WHAT WAS THAT LIKE?

I got a reasonable response, but that was three weeks after the Midnight Oil concert, when I broke the record for the most money collected in one shift, so anything would be a comedown from that.

HAS YOUR RECORD HELD OVER THE YEARS?

I got four hundred and twenty-four dollars, but someone beat that amount, although it was over a longer shift, so I think I still hold the record of most money per hour.

CAN YOU HEAR MUCH THROUGH THE SUIT?

Sometimes people mumble a joke and expect you to respond, but you don't hear them. I could hear REM and Midnight Oil OK, though. The REM gig was good, because it got cold at the end of the night and it had been warm during the day, so no-one really had a jumper, and everyone else was a bit envious of my suit.

ONE THING THAT WORRIES ME ABOUT THE SUIT IS THAT, IF YOU'RE MEANT TO BE AN OPTIMISTIC SYMBOL, THE DROOPY FACE WHEN YOU PUT THE MASK ON KIND OF COUNTERS THAT A BIT. HAVE THEY EVER TRIED PADDING THE HOOD?

The initial suits did have that kind of padding, but the problem was that people come in all shapes and sizes, and some of the taller people couldn't fit into the suits, so they ripped the padding out. I was really annoyed about that, because I'm really short, but gradually the number of padded suits came down. Since then, we've been experimenting with different kinds of hoods. You've got to keep in mind that you need a bit of space in there, because it gets really hot in there. My glasses tend to fog up really badly in the suit.

HOW HAS THE PUBLIC RESPONSE TO KOALAS CHANGED OVER TIME?

I think we've over-saturated the market a little bit. When we started out, people thought that koalas were hysterically funny, and would give money out simply on the laugh basis. Now, people have got used to us, so unless you do something new, it's harder to get people who are not particularly supportive of the Society to give us money.

WHAT'S THE CHARACTERISTIC NEGATIVE RESPONSE TO A KOALA? IS THERE MUCH ABUSE?

Abuse isn't all that common, but there are people who will abuse you just for being in a funny suit. There are people who don't realise that if you punch someone, there's not that much padding, and it hurts. I've been punched a few times...

I SUPPOSE SMALL CHILDREN DO THAT A LOT?

Yeah, they do. But that's not too much of a problem. It's a problem when big people do it though. On some occasions I think it was people who assumed that I would be totally padded in the suit. A few times it was genuine hostility.

HOSTILITY TOWARDS A KOALA? BUT WHY?

Well, mostly people who support logging, basically. Sometimes you can't tell. Once, I had a person hit me over the head with an umbrella. I was walking along, and all of a sudden I felt this great crack on my head. I had concussion - not really badly - and all of these people gathered around me, asking if I was alright, and I asked what happened and they told me that this guy had stepped out between two cars, hit me and then run off down a side-street. Now, I don't know if the guy was tripping, or what, or if he just hated koalas. At the REM concert, I was doing the dead koala act and this guy just thought I was a stuffed toy, part of the show, and he kicked me. I was lying with my legs apart - bad move - and I just sat up and groaned. He was so apologetic, he gave me ten dollars.

I'VE HEARD STORIES ABOUT THE DEAD KOALA ROUTINE - THAT IT'S QUITE A DANGEROUS MOVE TO MAKE...

I've never had any deliberate attacks when I do the dead koala. I've had people tickle me and poke me with their foot. There have only been two attacks on me when I've played dead: that one and another one where I was lying there, and I heard two guys talking. One said, "What's that on the footpath?" and the other guy said "I dunno, we'll see when we get there". The next thing I know, one of them just stood on my arm! I sort of jerked up, then he stepped on my leg as well, and then his mate said, "Hey, there was a bloke in that!" and the other one said, "No there wasn't" and his mate said, "Yeah, there was. It moved when you stood on it!" I have had deliberate attacks on me, but only when I was vertical.

WHAT ABOUT POSITIVE RESPONSES? DO THE KIDDIES LOVE YOU?

Yeah. Some kids are scared of you, but most kids love you. Adults, too. You get a lot of people who just want to give you a hug.

YOU GET A LOT OF HUGS, HUH?

A lot. I've actually had a lot of people try to pick me up. It's amazing how many people are turned on by the suit. It's quite bizarre.

HAVE YOU HEARD OF THE FURRIES? A GROUP OF PEOPLE WHOSE SEXUAL FETISH IS DRESSING UP IN ANIMAL COSTUMES?

No, but I'm not surprised by that, judging from some people's reaction to the suit. I koalaed at the Midsumma festival a couple of times, and once I had this lesbian pull off the hood and start kissing me, while her friends all stood around calling out, "It's a MALE koala!" When she finished kissing me, she said, "Well, that's the first male of any species I've ever kissed!" The attraction of the fur was greater than her basic gender attraction. Which says a lot about '90s sexuality, I guess. A lot of people want to dance with you. This one guy in the Punters Club offered me a dollar if I would wrestle with him, which I did. It was great. Afterwards, he said, "Thanks. I've always wanted to wrestle a koala, but they wouldn't let me do it at the zoo." It was between the bands, so the whole pub was watching. I got heaps of donations after that.

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